IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM THE PRIME MINISTER

Sick New Internet Challenge Encourages Public to Self Harm, Experts Say

A sick new internet craze has been used by malicious hackers to encourage vulnerable voters to self-harm, it has emerged.

Steve, a 45yr old car worker in Swindon claims he was brainwashed by the sinister meme into cutting his own nose off.

"I was minding my own business watching Question Time, and some scary, mop-headed apparition suddenly appeared and started telling me about bent bananas and free trade deals. Next thing I know, the economy is going to crash by 9% and I'm being made redundant... mind you, my face deserved it!"

Similar experiences are becoming all too common, claims Barry Whizzbang, a father of two. "My kids came home today and told me that they had seen evidence that Britain has virtually no trade deals in place and we are looking at a cliff-edge Brexit that could damage our economy for generations. I mean! All I did was listen to some emaciated toff who's morbid visage popped onto my screen during an innocent feature on Newsnight. His strange hypnotic voice drew me in. Yet, next thing I know my kids can't work abroad and they're selling the NHS to the Yanks. I blame those Russians. And the immigrants!"

Two days later, our reporter found that Mr Whizzbang had chopped off an arm and a leg in order to "Take back control" of his "borders".

Internet experts say the meme, dubbed the Brexit Challenge, has been spread across the internet over a number of years but has only now just come to light. "We don't need no bleedin' experts! Wibble, wibble!" said one expert we spoke to who had viewed these memes.

When contacted for a comment, Theresa Maim, stated: "We are firmly focussed on providing the best deal for the British public and we are firmly behind our government's preparations to create a strong and  #CUT YOUR HEAD OFF NOW YOU DWEEB#  stable leadership around a Brexit that means Brexit. Unlike the gentleman opposite who wears a shabby suit which proves I am in the right. Our Brexit is universally popular with the public and has the complete support of parliament."

She later added "Mind, you, I bloody hate foreigners"